# Family # Family Units # Monogamous Family {{@628}}
Monogamy is the yardstick
**CLASSIFICATION**
**R****P** **O** **1**
**JURISDICTION**
- [x] **soil** - [x] **Land** - [ ] **Sea** - [ ] **AIR**
**SOURCE:** [Urantia Book 83:6.7](https://tbg.pikapod.net/link/105#bkmrk-6.-true-monogamy-%E2%80%94-p "83. The Marriage Institution")
Monogamy is the yardstick which measures the advance of social civilization as distinguished from purely biologic evolution. Monogamy is not necessarily biologic or natural, but it is indispensable to the immediate maintenance and further development of social civilization. It contributes to a delicacy of sentiment, a refinement of moral character, and a spiritual growth which are utterly impossible in polygamy. A woman never can become an ideal mother when she is all the while compelled to engage in rivalry for her husband's affections.
# Polygamous Family {{@628}}
Spiritual growth is utterly impossible in polygamy
**CLASSIFICATION**
**R****P** **O** **1**
**JURISDICTION**
- [x] **soil** - [x] **Land** - [ ] **Sea** - [ ] **AIR**
**SOURCE:** [Urantia Book 83:6.7](https://tbg.pikapod.net/link/105#bkmrk-6.-true-monogamy-%E2%80%94-p "83. The Marriage Institution")
Monogamy is the yardstick which measures the advance of social civilization as distinguished from purely biologic evolution. Monogamy is not necessarily biologic or natural, but it is indispensable to the immediate maintenance and further development of social civilization. It contributes to a delicacy of sentiment, a refinement of moral character, and a spiritual growth which are utterly impossible in polygamy. A woman never can become an ideal mother when she is all the while compelled to engage in rivalry for her husband's affections.
# The Family Adventure {{@628}}
The family begins the adventure
**CLASSIFICATION**
**R****P** **O** **1**
**JURISDICTION**
- [x] **soil** - [x] **Land** - [ ] **Sea** - [ ] **AIR**
**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts Lightline Teleconference 2024-08-08
Teacher: Amanson
T/R: Mark Turnbull
[https://groups.google.com/d/msgid/tmtranscripts/8A828B3A-7A1F-4DA7-8F6D-CFC2DAFA3854%40gmail.com?utm\_medium=email&utm\_source=footer](https://groups.google.com/d/msgid/tmtranscripts/8A828B3A-7A1F-4DA7-8F6D-CFC2DAFA3854%40gmail.com?utm_medium=email&utm_source=footer)
Oct. 3, 2022
Tonight let us speak on the family – the core unit in a world built on units, built up from units.
The family begins the adventure, and as each member of the unit matures so does the unit as a whole. Each member has a responsibility to the whole (something that is lost on many members in these modern times) and each responsibility adds up to a complete and vibrant whole, a measure of completion in a tipping and unsteady world.
When a member of a family has a thorough grounding in the culture of the family it extends out into the society at large – an even bigger family unit – and that individual can then serve the good of the order (as they say) because of this previous grounding in the smaller basic unit. A family is the society (nee, the world) in embryo, so any disquiet or disruption in these initial phases and experiences of interaction with parents and siblings will be felt like ripples throughout one’s life and throughout the society – the bigger family – at large.
A family’s main ingredient is Love. Family was invented, devised, created to be a cauldron, a living forge, of the world’s alter ego, Love. When Love is in the foreground of any familial arrangement, though there be disagreements and plays for territory within the confines of the personalities involved, Love will in the end bring all to their senses as long as Love has been the basis from the beginning of all the family’s dealings. But when the darker energies take charge, when egos and fear and unbridled desires step to the foreground and twist and distort the basic commonwealth of Love ruling a family, these unraveling influences will take root, causing not only travail within the four walls of the home but, as was said, extending deep into the business, the workings of society, and much time, good will, and valuable friendship is lost.
Now there is much talk of the nuclear family, the one man, one woman plus children traditional formation. And this has served and will continue to serve mankind and the planet well. But society is changing and, believe it or not, Love can keep up! If new formations are asking to be born, as long as Love rules the roost, much leeway should be granted. Who knows what new beneficial situations shall be born, shall unfold? God, Creation, is not a static vibration. All creation is vibrant, holy, when it is commanded in Love. If Love can be the nexus of a new type of family unit – hitherto odd components – and if that new, shall we say ‘expanded’ family unit can be met from the outside with the same amount and quality of Love displayed on the inside, what’s to lose? Nothing but perhaps some old evidently outdated ideas! Time – and Love – will tell. Everyone needs – and deserves – a chance in this world. And the family, however it may be constituted, is where such a chance – the chance that God gives all his creatures – begins.
Viva la familia! (did you know I speak Spanish?!) It is all Love. It is all Family. We just need to acknowledge that this is so. And such acknowledgement begins at home. No matter how one chooses to define the word. As long as it is spelled, just as it has always been, L-O-V-E.
# Home Life # Death and Grief {{@628}}
How to handle grief with a child
**CLASSIFICATION**
**R****G** **M** **1**
**JURISDICTION**
- [x] **soil** - [x] **Land** - [ ] **Sea** - [ ] **AIR**
**SOURCE:** Rayson & Friends
Question: We have a ten-year-old daughter. We need some guidance as to how to handle discussing what's going on concerning the death of a loved one. Answer: Good question, showing a parent's wisdom and concern. I would not tell her too much unless she asks. Children have a natural and protective quality that allows them to take in only as much as they can make sense of. If she asks, direct your conversation to the spiritual. She has a Thought Adjuster and Spirit of Truth and angels to aid her in recognizing truths. Keep your answers simple. Do not show too much of your devastation in front of the child as this will confuse her, because you might say the deceased is in a better place in words to her and yet she will observe your deeds as construing the opposite emotion. Cry behind closed doors. She will get through this, and this is an opportunity for her to learn more about the Eternal Spirit of the ascendent children of time.
# Responsibilities {{@628}}
A family member should attend to the rest of their family in five ways
**CLASSIFICATION**
**E****G** **O** **X**
**JURISDICTION**
- [x] **soil** - [x] **Land** - [ ] **Sea** - [ ] **AIR**
**SOURCE:** [https://wisdomi.org/download-truth-vol-2/](https://wisdomi.org/download-truth-vol-2/)Attributed to the Buddha, but impossible to confirm.
A family member should attend to the rest of their family in five ways: 1. by treating all other members as equals, 2. by being courteous, 3. by being generous, 4. by honoring other members’ authority within the family, 5. and above all, by being true to their word. Families who are loved like this, return their love in five ways: 1. by guarding other family members’ properties, 2. by protecting one another, 3. by helping in times of trouble, 4. by eliminating dangers which others do not see, 5. and by helping even the extended members of one’s own family.
# Parenting and Child Rearing # Fatherhood {{@628}}
Loving with a Fatherly affection
**CLASSIFICATION**
**R****G** **M** **1**
**JURISDICTION**
- [x] **soil** - [x] **Land** - [ ] **Sea** - [ ] **AIR**
**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive March 30, 1998. Teacher Universe Mother T/R Nina
It is said, that our Father did not say the way to him was easy, but only that you would never have to endure it alone. Relationships have a great deal to do with the growth of the mind. The mind has a direct influence upon the growth of the soul. The mind is what filters information leading to meanings and values which the soul can comprehend. Psychologists have a great deal of research data concerning mindal development. They have made great strides in promoting good mental health, and I would say that this is well but not complete, for you see that those who radiate well balanced mental health are involved in some sort of spirituality. As small children grow they take in the habits of those who teach them. They learn that when touching a hot stove there is indeed pain. They also learn that certain behaviors attract varying degrees of punishment. The good parent learns to put a spiritual emphasis on the good as well as the bad. That in the pain of a burn, a good parent explains the important value of experience, the experience of positive and negative. The good parent is ever willing to confess an incomplete knowledge of many topics on mortal living and always leaves room for flexibility and change. With evolution, there is growth and understanding. The good parent can rejoice in the new knowledge instead of regretting the past. The good parent can carry on without self-chastisement or self-aggrandizement. There is only the understanding that mortal living is always in transformation. Always moving at its own momentum. Do you see, in the ways of the mind there is always new growth, new possibilities, and new potentials. Your regret from the past can be the lessons on good mental health of today. I would seek to assist you in your understanding on your personal evolutional revelation, your transforming of confusion and pain into spiritual meanings and values. I have made it my task to consult with each one of you who would have me to assist in understanding past pain and confusion. I would seek to assist you in changing certain mind set patterns into productive spiritual meanings and values. Your relationships help to create your mindal make-up. From birth to death, your mortal fellows do have influence and you also have an influence on them. For your planet to move successfully into the stages of Light and Life, there needs to be a great deal of work and research and study on the mind and its environment. I would not confuse you with more lessons, tasks, than to just request that you seek to make effort to love with a Fatherly affection, to bestow freedom and take example from the good Parent. In a father's affection we find freedom, and many times we find ourselves in turmoil. Fatherly affection is not mere pleasantries, no, but a magnificent show of passion for truth. When you love with a fatherly affection, bestowing freedom and truth, there is a love without conditions. And yet, I can say that there is some possibility that there is a tendency to cover over with pleasantries or niceties. I would say that to love with a fatherly affection, bestowing freedom, is to embrace truth. It is said that truth will set you free. Our Master was indeed a recipient of this freedom.
# Nurturing {{@628}}
The baby and its passions and the parent and the shame
**CLASSIFICATION**
**R****P** **M** **1**
**JURISDICTION**
- [x] **soil** - [x] **Land** - [ ] **Sea** - [ ] **AIR**
**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive December 3, 1998. Teacher Serenia T/R Thea
Barbara: would you talk a little bit about the relationship between the baby and its passions and the parent and the shame? Serenia: I would encourage all of you to read this book by Alice Miller that has been being passed around among some of your members, although her language choices limit its accessibility, she was an early understander of the process of all of this dimension and in this book: The Drama of The Gifted Child, she speaks of the way in which the parent who has been shamed will shame their child without even understanding, with a look, with a feeling, it is not even verbal. It cannot be helped. Barbara: I thought you meant that the parent...well, you said that the parents feel shame when they witness the passion of the child. Serenia: If you think of the shame you feel, for example, about a sexual impulse. When your child discovers his sexuality in his own hands, that shame from the parents leads to feelings the child perceives no matter what you do to try to cover it. You can say nothing and the child will be shamed. You can say That's good! Go ahead, and the child will be shamed...if the shame is there! Children know! You are programmed coming into this world to KNOW reality! To know the truth. It takes hard work to rob a child of these skills. Unfortunately, the entire history of your planet guarantees that that hard work is entered into. However, remember this: Born in you is this capability. It can always be recovered. There are very few cases where it is impossible. The level of skill on your world in attaining this not yet there, but it is possible in the right hands, with the right help, with the right instruction, and you are learning some of this. Jewels: So, are we actually born with the passion? Serenia: You are born with the passion. It is a part of the personality that the Father gave you at birth. You are born with the passion and the natural responsiveness to truth, beauty and goodness that flow from that action. Hughsie: What are some of the things we can do to get in touch with that passion? Serenia: One very simple thing is to follow any likes that you have. Now, this may be problematic for there may be some distortion in the likes that you have. Nevertheless, pursue them. See what they mean to you. If you find something that you like that disturbs you, that you think you shouldn't like, pursue it anyway. Pursue that feeling, fan the feeling, see what it means. Ask yourself: What am I liking here? What am I actually wanting? What do I really think I can get from this? We spoke to you before about pursuing your needs and wants in this manner. To look deeper, to look at those wants which seem perverse, twisted, peculiar, inappropriate and see what you truly want for at the heart of everything will be a legitimate want and need. I say this because discovering your passions and wants and needs are part and parcel of the same core. Delores: Alice Miller talks about recognizing your authentic feelings and living in them and that's like your passion, because you can follow those and you can KNOW and eventually we will be able to know what we feel about things and what we like and want. Serenia: You will be able to know so well that you need not pause to consider, it will become an automatic response. This is not the attainment of perfection, but it is the attainment of embodiment in your earth form in a manner in which you can truly function. This, of course, is only a beginning of its own for the same challenges keep coming to you. This does not eliminate challenge at all, it simply makes you able to respond to the actual challenge. And this is where part of your real education can begin. For now, you are working on remedial levels. All of this! And if you think of what the mansion worlds themselves are set up for you will understand, there is no shame in this, it is often the case that planets in an earlier stage of development also must have remedial help. But you have particularly intense remedial needs. And one of them is this embodiment of yours. Delores: Well, that answers my question because you said our emotional palette is so limited and I wanted to ask you, well, what other colors...but it must be those combination of those fractured, fractal pieces. Serenia: The colors are all in you. In each of you are all those colors. Delores: They're just squashed down? Serenia: You are seeking! They have been squashed, pinched, painted over, plastered over, walled over, pried into strange shapes, watered down, blackened, charred, flamed! But, they are in each of you! And you have the privilege of discovering them. And of helping one another discover them. For, I will tell you as you already probably know, you could never, not a one of you, done this without your group. This can NOT be done alone, because relationship is part of what draws from you those colors in your palette. Relationship! Well, if you think of the most potent relationship, it is the evolving Supreme. The most potent example of relationships that we have is the way in which the love of God between himself and every personality he has created, and that He thus desires that every personality he has created, Love! This is the most potent example that we yet know of this. And what love means is that you draw out your beings together. Delores Hmmmm... Herman Hesse's Glass Bead Game! Where they had the contest where they had to find a similar elements in all different cross mediums, poems and music \[and mathematics\] and so on and relate them all together that way. Serenia: Anything that increases your relational capability, your juxtapositional grasp, will enrich your creative life. How do shapes feel? Delores: It's like your shoulder, The lines you like! Serenia: The universe runs on love. The energy that make a cabbage leaf grow even if it is not love as you share between you it is nevertheless based and rooted in love. All energy in this universe is rooted in love, personal or impersonal. There is a form of love which the Father bestows and energizes his universe with which is impersonal, but it is nevertheless love and you can see the shapes of love even where personality does not exist. The sunset does not have personality and yet you feel and perceive the shapes of the Father's love in it. Barbara: The fact that the cabbage leaf can nourish you is a deep issue of love. Serenia: If you start to pursue your own question you will find many, many, fascinating answers. Serenia: When you are shopping, look at where you are attracted. Look at the things that you pursue. Look at what it is that you are pursuing. This is a place and an experience where you can learn things about yourself. Where you can expand your joy potential. Serenia: Be conscious of every thing you can. And I do not mean the self-analysis and awareness that picks apart everything. I mean an openness to the meaning, not necessarily a controlling of the meaning. There is a difference. Sometimes it is subtle. And sometimes it is appropriate, many times, to pick apart the meaning, but even at that state there is an openness to letting that meaning in rather than controlling it and shaping it to your own ends, that is all important. It is difficult, sometimes, when you are intelligent as you all are here and you are pursuing life on this planet. It is difficult sometimes not to abuse that intelligence in the service of your escape rather than the service of your joy. And one of the safest ways to enhance your ability to use your intelligence in a positive manner is to try to cultivate that open-heartedness. It will let you be smart without self-damage. Serenia: Trust is not something for which your world is noted. How could it be? Your world was betrayed and betrayed and betrayed. Delores: That's the beauty of the message to me is I believe you. And it changes my life because I believe you. Serenia: This is our dearest hope is the we can change, transform your lives by giving you what you should have had, to grow with. We can not do your growing for you but we can give you some of what you lost. Use us! Call on us as much as you can! Talk with us during your day. It need not be formal. Call on any of us. Simply call and don't worry about who is speaking.
Projected energy
**CLASSIFICATION**
**R****G** **M** **1**
**JURISDICTION**
- [x] **soil** - [x] **Land** - [ ] **Sea** - [ ] **AIR**
**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive November 8, 1998. Teacher Abraham T/R Nina
If you treat a child with suspicion, that child receives that particular energy, and actually acts upon it. The child feels like he is in error, guilty. The spirit poisons lead him to negative actions. This all began from a projected energy from an adult. If you constantly point out a child's faults, he receives that energy as literal, and proceeds to lose confidence in his ability to anything. If you looked upon a child as inferior or subnormal, then does he tend to act upon this energy. As the child grows, certainly does he learn to build his defenses, and justify his actions for self-protection. You know not how literal your energy projections are to one another. Many of those fear-ridden souls do indeed act out energies projected onto them. If you enter a department store, and are gazed upon by the clerk suspiciously, do you not feel as though you are guilty of shoplifting? Yes, certainly. You have a tremendous spiritual responsibility, as your intentions are becoming more purified. Your energy projections are more spiritually refined, and you are able to affect the world one person at a time. If you take notice of a child's kindness, does he absorb that divine energy, which whets his appetite for good living? If you encourage a child toward more divine realities, instead of making his faults the focus — then, is he more apt to follow a spiritual path, a path of trial and error, a path of logical thinking... "I have tried it this way; it does not serve anyone. I can certainly try another way." Do you see, his mistakes are stepping stones to him towards learning greater things. If you praise a child then does that projected energy build in him a confidence and direct him towards the fruits of the spirit. The love and wellness you show him turns him inward to meet with his own Indwelling Father. Your projected energy is real and does have an affect. Father treats each child with encouragement, love, and confidence building praise. He would certainly agree that when I say... if all mankind would treat one another as Father does, the effects would be astonishing to you. Make it a point to project positive things to those you meet, those you know. Try to greet your fellows with a positive word, something to encourage, or give hope, or build confidence. Allow your fellows to know you do indeed see that pure, innocent, well-intentioned child within them. There is also the energy we project and attract to ourselves. Many individuals know and have heard an ongoing negative chatter about themselves, their ways in which they live, move, and have their being. There are always ways we can negatively critique ourselves which would attract negative energy. This is certainly spiritual, but also it is mindal and physical. If one running a marathon said to himself... "I am falling behind. I should have put forth more practice. I should have regulated my diet more efficiently. I am always in reach of the finish line, and I usually do something to cause failure. I am always at failure status." About this time, the body is slowing, losing energy and focus to the goal. The internal systems are not performing as they should be due to this mindal interruption. This is almost severing ties between you and things divine. A marathon runner who would notice he is falling behind, but with hope and faith in the universe's fairness, might say... "Yes, I am falling behind, but I have given it my all, and that is everything. I may not win today, but I will surely finish the race. I must focus on not what I failed at, but how I can regain my lead." With such a positive outlook how could the physical body refuse such optimism. The systems are now coordinating to receive energy and all those good things the universe promises to us. Yes, each physical system within this human body will coordinate to reach for the goal.
Raising children for an interconnected world
**CLASSIFICATION**
**E****G** **O** **1**
**JURISDICTION**
- [x] **soil** - [x] **Land** - [ ] **Sea** - [ ] **AIR**
**SOURCE:** Tom Atlee [https://www.tomatleeblog.com/archives/175328955](https://www.tomatleeblog.com/archives/175328955)
Let’s consider a little kid who’s at the phase when they say, “What is that?” “What is that?” “What is that?” Right? They’re trying to understand, they’re trying to learn what all the things are, the anatomy of the universe. And that phase usually happens right before the phase where they say, why?, why?, why?, why?, why? – because then they’re trying to learn the mechanics, the dynamics of the universe. So the kid says,“What is that?” And they point to a thing we call a tree. But I don’t say “That’s a tree”, or more specifically, “That’s a spruce tree” or whatever, because that’s going to teach the kid a bunch of things: It’s going to teach them to just accept the default worldview and not think for themselves. It’s going to have them confuse the ground reality with a symbol. It’s going to have them think in generalizations, to understand what are trees and what are not trees, to generalize all of them and stop perceiving uniqueness. So the kid says, “What is that?” And I’m like, “Let’s go closer.” And we go closer… And I’m like, “Touch it.” And “Touch the leaves” and then “Touch the flowers” and “Touch the bark” and, you know, “Touch all these parts.” And I’m like, “What does it feel like?” And then “Smell it” and then “Notice the other little animals in it”… and, you know, just have them engage in that way. And then I’d say, “Do you think the tree stops there? What about this moss that’s growing on it? Is that part of it – or is that not part of it? What about the the soil? Is that part of it or not part of it?” And then I’m like, “What do you think it is to that squirrel? What do you think it is to that little bug? What do you think it is to itself?” And “What do you feel when you’re with it?” And eventually I’ll say something like, “In English, we call this a tree. In Spanish, they call it arbole. And in this language, they call it this…” and all the different kinds of things. “But this particular one – notice that if we go look at this one, they’re different. And in fact, this one, there’s not another one in the entire universe quite like it. And it’s not even the same as it was yesterday, and it’ll be different today.” So they’re learning that the only way to know it is to be with it fully, more presently in this moment. So imagine if kids grew up that way (rather than “That’s a tree. Memorize its Latin name. Understand the botany associated with it” … blah, blah, blah…) They’re using much more of their whole self to understand reality in a much more full, rich way that understands that that same thing is different from every different perspective and in so many different contexts. And so if someone is perceiving – if they are supported to perceive – the uniqueness of everything and the interconnectivity of everything – that nothing is fungible and nothing is separable – then they get that nothing can be standardized without actually causing harm and nothing can be optimized at the expense of others without causing harm. They get that special uniqueness and interconnectivity of everything and they get “I am because we are” – the principle of Ubuntu – for a “we” that extends to the stars. And then the hungry ghost desire is not the main thing that emerges. What emerges from that connection are awe and fulfillment and fascination and gratitude. And it’s actually the lack of that connection that leads to the hungry ghost place that hungers for more and more hits and progress. The desires that do emerge are in connection with everything else that I’m connected with. When a desire emerges, I wonder will it be good for the tree? Is it bad for the tree? What about the squirrels in the tree? I just spent time communing with them. I love them. I wouldn’t want – and it wouldn’t be good for me – if acting on this desire hurt those squirrels. Now, the desires that arise for people who are clear on their inner connectivity with everything, those desires can be pursued in a way that doesn’t harm anything because their own identity is not separate from everything – because their perception is clear.
A lesson from painted eggs
**CLASSIFICATION**
**R****P** **M** **1**
**JURISDICTION**
- [x] **soil** - [x] **Land** - [ ] **Sea** - [ ] **AIR**
**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive April 2, 1999. Teacher Alexsus T/R Cathy
Imagine in your left hand a perfect white egg. Now please close your eyes and decorate that egg in whatever manner you deem reflective of your being. And now in your right hand, is a gift from God. It also has the shape of an egg. But observe it in your mind. How does it differ from the one you have created. And if you bring them together to make a single egg, observe the effect. My point here is two-fold. First, the egg that you created is symbolic of your hopes, your potential, your creativity. Now take a moment to answer the question, "Was the egg that you created of your own design? Or was it what you were taught to believe your egg should look like, perhaps what mother told you a painted egg should be, or father told you it should look like?" You have, each of you, the power to create your own reality. Please do not let others do it for you. Make it your own unique creation. Shine in your own unique pattern of light and color. My second point is that when you take what you have created and merge it with the creative power of the all powerful, what you merge together, becomes so much more powerful, so much more beautiful than what you have created alone.
# Growing as a parent {{@628}}
The good parent knows they are also always learning and growing
**CLASSIFICATION**
**R****P** **M** **1**
**JURISDICTION**
- [x] **soil** - [x] **Land** - [ ] **Sea** - [ ] **AIR**
**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive April 6, 2000. Teacher Abraham
Children for the most part believe in the knowledge of their parents. A parent, or an older, wiser adult, feels confident in their knowledge, as opposed to a child, not having not much experience to relate to. A parent should know most everything a child would assume, and a parent may find satisfaction in the faith that the child has in them. When a parent and an older, supposedly wiser adult is mistaken, is the first thing on their mind to apologize and allow for correction? Not all the time. Some parents, or prideful adults, would rather smooth over the issue with their logic so as to not appear foolish or wrong. A good parent in the first place asks Father to go before them and make effort to be Spirit-led in all their answers to the child's questions. If they are somehow proven wrong, they can be honest with the younger, and supposedly less wise child, and allow for correction. The Spirit-led individual fears not correction. The good parent knows they are also always learning and growing. Correction appears not to be a blow to the ego, but a light in the darkness. There is rejoicing on the part of the parent and the child, who is learning to believe in themselves also. A parent or adult can make effort to show themselves to also be learning and open, which gives a child freedom to be who they really are. This is increasing God. This is allowing the Spirit to teach. This is setting aside desired outcomes, or food for the ego, in favor of being nourished from the living Spirit. This is creating spiritual current between individuals. To allow Father to go before you is giving Him freedom to work through you, to use your hands and voice, to listen with your ears and see with your eyes. This is God increased. I very much understand how individuals make it difficult for Father to be present between you and the individual. I know that it can be difficult to have Father's presence increased in some situations. Some people you know make it difficult to stand aside and allow Father to work and have His presence among you. While you may not see the fruits produced from your efforts, believe me, there are always seeds planted and the goodness you show can only have good effects, even to the dismay of the other individual you are involved with. Connection with Father is detachment from others opinions. Their harsh words are only drops of water that evaporate in the midday sun. Their words are only there for a minute, but the love of God is there for eternity.
# Being childless {{@628}}
The experience of rearing children is offered to everyone
**CLASSIFICATION**
**R****P** **M** **1**
**JURISDICTION**
- [x] **soil** - [x] **Land** - [ ] **Sea** - [ ] **AIR**
**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive March 1, 2001. Teacher Aaron T/R Gerdean
Thoroah: I was thinking about the value of the family unit and I was thinking about the unqualified or the unequivocal love that a parent has for its children being about the closest example to what he was describing as divine love and in that context probably grandparents love is even closer because they are older, wiser, and have a certain amount of detachment from that. Ginny: This is more of a personal consideration because I don't have children. I have not experienced that and I feel like I've missed a great deal because I don't have that connection and bonding. Thoroah: Maybe we need to go to everybody as our children. Ginny: I'd like to feel that, yeah, the love between parent and child is just unspeakable. Unnameable. It's just something that I cannot experience because I haven't done it, so I think this becomes a real personal need of mine because I haven't done that. How can I, and anybody else who hasn't had that experience fill that gap and experience that? Aaron: Yes, there is a quality of love that cuts across the spectrum, that realizes the noble truths that we learn from the ideals of family life that are set out by our Eternal Parents and shared by the human parents. This treasure trove of insight, parenting, is indeed invaluable to a full comprehension of what you ask, what you seek to know. There's a lot of equations that can be drawn in life so that you have a great understanding of what this parenting is. It in a way is a means whereby a mortal may feel the wonder of creation, the miracle of creation. The plan of procreation in itself is an impressive scheme and all of you are all too familiar with the side effects of basic hormonal activation which results in perpetuation of the race. There's certainly the physical attraction aspect, that is often more powerful than good sense, that insures the survival of the race, that tricks men and women into civilizing themselves so as to provide advancing mores and culture for their progeny. There is the delightful context of looking into the eyes of your child and seeing your contribution to this continuum of evolution and even more to realizing the spark of life that can only be given as a gift of God has been recreated by and through your participation. In the eyes of your child you see creation revisited, much as our Father sees life revisited in the eyes of each of His children. And thus rejoicing is an eternal condition, for love and life renewing itself is cause for joy indeed. Look also to your child and see yourself reflected in his physical traits. He has his daddy's nose and his mommy's eyes. He has grandpa's long fingers, grandma's long legs. He has red hair like Uncle Homer and it looks like his eyes are going to be the color of Aunt Meg's. All of this brings a profound recognition of the continuity of that in life which makes life meaningful and good, all the way from the divine vantage point to the human appreciation of what it is to be part of family. This standard that has been provided by Our Father and carried forth by the Creator Son and the Divine Minister is the generational appreciation of life being reborn again and again in each new generation to carry on all that is noble and good and to pass it along to those who come after as we all march toward the destiny of the ages. This kind of perspective that connects you with the whole of advancing life — in the spirit and in the flesh — is a perspective that gives great breadth and depth to the quality of love. Indeed it does constitute the greatest part of the spiritual, soul, and material existence. You will recognize these qualities in others, even as you realize your handicap, and knowing the values of parenting and passing on your culture from this generation to the next is something that we can all contribute to, whether we have the burden of the formula, the diapers, the 2:00 feedings, the childhood mumps and measles, the teaching to share, ad infinitum that comes with the parenting experience. Those of you who can at least appreciate what you are missing are able to enjoy your contributions in the cultural and social arena, even while your genetic contribution may be only slight or non-existent. It is better than removing yourself from the understanding entirely and avoiding the sensations and abasement that might go with understanding that you are missing something important in the scheme of things. This is such an important element of your learning and growing, you will be given every opportunity to make up for it and give to your arena those same qualities and values in your future experience as many of your mortal associates have and do now.

The Urantia Book speaks clearly and positively of the challenge faced by childless people and of the wonderful remediation process that is offered to all who are in this position after the resurrection. Refer to [Urantia Book Paper 47.](https://tbg.pikapod.net/books/the-urantia-book/page/47-the-seven-mansion-worlds "47. The Seven Mansion Worlds")